Whatever...

I’m like, so whatever. Which, apparently is not really a good thing.

But I am, according to my daughters who who seem to have picked up half of their vocabulary from American tv shows, visits to America or in this case I think from the singer Avril Lavigne.

In the recent past I have also been labelled as ‘random,’ ‘bogus’ and ‘awesome,’ at various times, but the ‘like so whatever’ has been my favourite.

That’s because it combines two of the words that appear to have muscled their way into the language now to be used freely by anyone who can’t think of anything more coherent to say.

And it’s not just kids either by the way because I heard a woman on a radio talk show recently who used the word ‘like’ about 200 times during her time on air.

So, like, if I like, can’t like, think of anything like else to say like, I have like a ready made filler, like.

Yeah, whatever.

It’s not such a new thing really I suppose.

I mean down the road from me in Derry, the word ‘high’ has forced its way into a similar position of importance.

So for instance if a person from there were to describe the Empire State Building they might say “it’s wile high, high.”

And we’d like, totally think this was bogus and would always, like, have a secret chuckle to ourselves, like.

All that said I’m baffled as to why people are going so crazy about these latest trends, unless like me they are worried they will not be able to catch on to the way words can now be used at biscuit.

I was going to say at random, but I don’t think it’s supposed to be used in that way any more so I took the biscuit.

Anyway one of the reasons English professors are pinpointing as a cause in the breakdown in our language is the growth of text messaging.

Text messaging by the way is apparently more popular here in Ireland than anywhere else in the world.

To be really cool these days you have to have discovered text messaging and by that I mean, be able to text message to people without using actual words.

Yep, to be a real text it should really be sent in text language which means that if anyone over 30 receives one they won’t have a clue what the message is.

You see text language is really not a new language, but a whole old language with big pieces chopped off.

For instance if I was to say “hello to someone” using that system it would be something like - L O 2 Sum 1.

You can also say such wonderful phrases as BCNU (be seeing you) or 2moro (tomorrow) all without having to tap out the whole word or phrase on the tiny phone keypad.

It wasn’t that long ago that if you had people sitting in a pub staring at their mobile phones and grinning away to themselves there was a fair old chance they might be on the way to being hauled away by men in white coats.

Of course a couple of years ago we didn’t have the problem because then we barely knew how to turn on a mobile phone never mind use them to send text messages or e.mail or play games and even maybe the odd time actually phone somebody!

Nowadays though text junkies are everywhere, in shops and buses and offices – all grinning away because sum 1 has asked them ruok (are you okay).

Irish people grasped this whole text concept pretty quickly although they were encouraged by the phone companies anxious to muscle in on the extra cash they could make. For those struggling to catch on there are even booklets to help people in their search for useful text words.

In the list there are things like – H8 (hate) or ….wait for this one ‘2’ which apparently can mean to, two or too!

In an effort to find out if the book company had wasted its time producing such a book, I went along and asked some people on the streets and here’s what I found out:

Mary - “The booklet was like so helpful, like, it really was, like.”

John – “It was awesome, dude.”

Pat – “See that wee book high, some job high.”

Avril – “It’s like, so whatever.”

And, apparently…that is not a good thing.