Tree cheers for Christmas!

With Christmas fast approaching it seemed like the obvious thing to do would be to write about something seasonal. It was either that or the budget so I decided that people would be depressed enough thinking about the budget.

And so, I trekked deep undercover into the heart of the dark Mongorrey forest where I met up with someone central to the celebrations at this time of year – Chris Mystery.

 

For hundreds of years he’s been one of the images associated with the festive season, but could I find out what he was really like?

 

So Chris what is your earliest childhood memory?

I don’t really like to talk about my childhood too much. To be honest I was a bit of a sap when I was wee and as a result I ended up getting cut off from my family and friends.

 

You mean you don’t see them at all now?

Well at this time of year there’s always the chance I’ll bump into one of them, but nope not really. I do pine for them sometimes and I’m determined that one day I’ll go back to my roots.

 

How did you end up in the festive season business?

It was a fluke really. I was cut off from my family and friends and was backed into a corner. I didn’t know what to do so I started trying to come up with ideas. Suddenly a wee light came on, then another and then another...people liked them and it all kinda branched out from there.

 

(Dramatic pause here....it might take a wee while for some people to twig...)

 

You are a symbol of the season now, but what other things about this time of year do you like?

I guess the fact that if you’re told to stand in the corner for the present, it inevitably comes. And I’m pretty proud of the bravery I’ve shown at this time of the year. I’ve been knocked over and buried into buckets and clamped into stands but just kept a brave face all the time. Yep, bravery...jeekers I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve been decorated at this stage!

 

So are there things you are not that keen on at this time of the year?

Well I guess like anyone, I don’t like getting sick. I remember a few years back I had a terrible bout of tinsellitis.

Oh and there’s the way Christmas music has changed over the years as well. I mean at one stage it was all beautiful Christmas carols and for about 300 years we had a guaranteed number one from Cliff Richard. Now it’s all thump, thump, thump and fast talking rhyme. I can’t believe how popular that rappin paper has become!

 

If you won the lotto what would you do?

Well if I won the lotto I guess I’d take a well earned break and I’d most likely go on a boat trip. Hey it would be nice for me to get a chance to sit on the ferry for a change!